I recently reviewed a pair of French comedies, complaining about the lack of good American comedies lately. These two films here are exactly what I'm talking about. I won't even bother to separate them as they both have all the same problems. In the completely unnecessary remake of The Pink Panther, Steve Martin puts on a ridiculous French accent to play the role of Inspector Jacques Clouseau. Originally made famous and a thousand times funnier, by the comedy-genius Peter Sellers. You can practically smell the desperation in the filmmakers attempts to make us laugh. Steve Martin, who himself once was an incredibly funny man, making stupid comedy seem brilliant, in films like The Jerk. Seems lost in how to make a joke work as Clouseau. He simply pumps everything up to 11; the stupidity of his character is so far out there, it's no longer funny.

I felt the exact same way about Robin Williams in License to Wed. This often intensely hilarious actor, seems out of his depth. I didn't find myself laughing once at his portrayal as Reverend Frank. His nonsensical ideas on how to bring Mandy Moore and John Krasinski together as a couple, didn't once seem genuine. There has to be at least a certain sense of reality, when trying to make us laugh. Krasinski, who I find very funny and charismatic on the great show The Office, seems demeaned to be playing this guy set to be married to the ultra-bland Moore. He does the cliche' romantic-comedy thing, of constantly lying to his partner, performing ridiculous often illegal acts, getting himself deeper into trouble, when a moment of truth would resolve everything.

Poor Kevin Kline and Jean Reno, both great performers in their own rights, couldn't have been more obvious in their lackadaisical approaches to their characters. They both seemed embarrassed to be part of the mess that is The Pink Pather. Emily Mortimer, who plays Clouseau's love interest, is the only one that had any realistic attachment to her character, but she's in the film so briefly that she can't help. Beyonce, once again does her, "look Mom, I'm acting!", thing that I can't stand. The only performances with any life to be found in License to Wed, were done by some of the bit roles. I like young Josh Flitter as the Reverend's aid, he brings some life to his character, and out funnies Williams. Brian Baumgartner, Kevin from The Office, is maniacally over-the-top as another finance going through Reverend Frank's trials, but he at least seems to be trying to get some laughs.

The filmmakers behind these two extremely lame attempts at comedic filmmaking should be embarrassed by these movies. They are sloppily put together, with no real sense of zest, horribly acted by reliable performers, and worse beyond anything, not funny. I think between these two films, I had three slight chuckles, but countless groans at the pathetic attempts at humor. Not once was I drawn into the film or made to care about anyone in the least, I remained a distant viewer throughout each. The only worthwhile moment in either film is the opening credits animation in The Pink Panther, because it reminded me of the better versions of the film. - Grade: C- (Seen on 6/4/08) License to Wed plain sucked throughout. - Grade: D- (Seen on 6/15/08)

As much as I like reviewing films, I'd like to branch out in my writing. Not beyond films, no, that'd be silly, just different aspects of movies. Recently I was nominated by Elgringo over at He Shot Cyrus, probably my #1 fan, to write about The 12 Movies Meme, originated by Lazy Eye Theatre - Which asks, what if YOU could pick 12 movies to run at the New Beverly Cinema? (Which is a popular revival theater in L.A.) I thought I'd take that challenge.

I wasn't sure where the hell to start. There are too many films log-jammed in my brain to even know where to begin. Taking a look at He Shot Cyrus' list, I saw that he featured two old Peter Jackson films. Out of that grew my idea, showcasing some of the lesser know films from my favorite directors, and trying to program them together by genre. So here we go:

Monday-Tuesday

Start with a pair of family films, that everyone can enjoy.

Pee-wee's Big Adventure - Tim Burton's first feature length film. I think most folks remember this film... but do the know how freaking good it is? This film is constantly surreal, utterly hilarious, undeniably quotable and just plain fun. Plus it features my all-time-favorite score; Danny Elfman's 2nd, who's gone on to become one of the biggest composers in Hollywood.

Time Bandits - Terry Gilliam is one of my favorite filmmakers, he has an absolutely unique vision. In the right circles, this is a fairly well known film, but your average Joe has never heard of it. A brave group of little-people take on God. It's appropriate for kiddies, and would just be a total blast to see on the big screen.

Wednesday-Thursday

Some adult fare, with a couple of forgotten epics.

Empire of the Sun - Absolutely everybody knows who Steven Spielberg is. If you ask a random person on the street to name a film director, I bet at least 5 out of 10 answers would be him. But even a lot of film buffs, don't remember his 1987 film Empire of the Sun, which introduced a very young, British accent and all, Christian Bale. The film follows this young lad through WWII, as he moves from a posh life as an aristocrat to living in a Japanese P.O.W. camp. Brilliant, moving film.

Le Grand bleu - Most people think Luc Besson's career started with La Femme Nikita, but he made three feature films before that one. And since Subway and Le Dernier combat aren't very good, I chose Le Grand bleu. It's the story of a deep-sea-diver going for the world's record for deepest dive sans respirator. But it's so much more than that, a beautiful film about friendship and finding your life's limits.

Friday-Saturday

A couple of great B-movies, for the weekend

In the Mouth of Madness - Everyone knows the classic John Carpenter: Halloween, The Fog, The Thing, Escape from New York, Big Trouble in Little China - But how about the last film he did, before his talent seemed to leave him? Madness is a seriously scary and messed up film.

Starship Troopers - This is an under-appreciated classic. Politically subversive, full of over-the-top violence, nudity and giant bugs getting the shit blasted out of them; an utterly brilliant, yet incredibly stupid film all at the same time.

Sunday-Monday

Crimewave - I'm getting really obscure, from one of Hollywood's biggest directors. After breaking out with the cult-classic Evil Dead, Sam Spider-man's Raimi, created a little know slapstick-action film about little nerd taking on a pair of psycho-exterminators. The film is highly influenced by Looney Toons and features a very young Bruce Campbell.

After Hours - After Spielberg, among today's directors, Martin Scorsese would probably qualify as the 2nd best known director working. His list of classic films is long, I don't need to name them. But how many of you have seen After Hours? Cult actress Rosanna Arquette takes Griffin Dunn on a wild ride through New York, destroying his life and opening his eyes.

Tuesday-Wednesday

The Man Who Wasn't There - Sure, everyone knows the Coen Brother's films No Country for Old Men, Fargo, The Big Lebowski & Raising Arizona - All classic films, all too easy. So my pick from my favorite filmmakers, is their 2001 dark-comedy. Billy Bob Thorton stars in this underrated, double, triple-cross mystery film, with some classic Coen brother touches.

Weird Science - In the 80's filmmaker John Hughes had an unprecedented run of films, creating seven classic, to near-classic films in five years, and then he lost it all. Between Sixteen Candles, The Breakfast Club and Ferris Bueller's Day Off, he created the surreal and hilarious film Weird Science. Oh, we've all seen it a thousand times on cable, but I'd love to see this film on the big screen, with an eager audience. Kelly Lebrock, gorgeous, and larger-than-life. Anthony Michael Hall, one of the greatest teen actors ever, at his peak. Totally awesome.

Thursday-Friday

Dark City - Alex Proyas isn't necessarily a well known director, depending on who you talk to his biggest film is either The Crow or I, Robot. But far-and-away his best film is Dark City, an absolutely brilliant sci-fi/noir mystery. Coming out in 1998, it was instantly overshadowed a year later, by the somewhat similar and far flashier film The Matrix, so it never got the attention it deserved. In my opinion it's the most beautifully photographed film ever.

A Clockwork Orange - Okay, not an unknown film in the least. But how many have us have seen it on the big screen? I've seen 2001, it's beautiful, but boring! The Shining, yeah, scary as hell. But this, my favorite Kubrick film, no, I've never had the pleasure. The gorgeous photography, the brilliant mis-en-scene and editing, the incredible score, and Malcolm McDowell's gloriously over-the-top performance as cinema's all-time-greatest antihero Alex. I can't think of anything better to end this with.

This was a film I'd never heard of before, but when I ran across it on IFC, it sounded like my kind of movie. A dark-comedy about an alien invasion, made during the 80's. Unfortunately it's one of those "almost" films, where it's almost a good film, almost a cult-classic, but something is missing. Strange Invaders has a lot of the right ingredients, but it was thrown together a little sloppily, cooked at too high a temperature, so the final product isn't totally appealing.

The film starts in 1955, in a small town in Illinois. There's a young couple making out in a truck, when unseen to them a large spaceship lands near town. When the boy goes home, there are some strange lights, a creepy shadow of a hand, a scream, and the film cuts to 1983, New York City. Charles is hanging out at home, when his ex-wife and daughter show up. His ex asks him to watch their kid, while she goes home for a few days to help her mother. When she doesn't come back for a couple of weeks, and he can't get a hold of her, he begins to seriously worry. He leaves his daughter with grandma, and drives out to the same small town we saw at the beginning of the film.

Everything still looks very 1950's. But that's the least of Charles worries, when he starts to ask around town, nobody has ever heard of his wife or her family. This seems extremely strange in a town so small. He's about to leave town, when his car breaks down. He stops for a bite to eat, when suddenly there's a laser blast and his car is blown up, and there's a mob outside the restaurant looking very menacing. He does the sensible thing and jumps out the back window, stealing a car from the lot, and begins to tear out of town. On his way out, he catches a glimpse of what looks like an alien, who shoots some kind of death ray, from his face no less, at him as he speeds away, only catching the tail of his car. This is one of the best scenes in the film, and a good set-up for what I hoped would be a fun flick the rest of the way.

When Charles gets back to New York, he tries to get the government involved, but of course nobody believes him, writing him off as a nut-case. That's when he sees a photo in a cheesy tabloid of an alien that looks very much like the one he saw. He visits the paper, where he meets Betty, played by 80's hottie Nancy Allen, who after her own run-in with some weird alien activity believes Chuck's story. Soon they have a gaggle of aliens chasing them through the city, trying to stop their story from getting out any further. Mostly the aliens keep their human disguises, but when they do reveal themselves, the effects are pretty well done.

When the film takes a turn towards a more modern, alien-action-chase, the movie kind of falls apart. They lose most of the comedy that was keeping the film lively, and the filmmaking isn't exciting enough to keep you on the edge of your seat, the way they intended. By this point it's pretty obvious what truly happened to Charles ex-wife, so the film loses the mystery long before the truth is revealed, leaving the ending fairly anti-climatic.

The first half of the film is a throw back to the old sci-fi films of the 1950's. A nice tone is set between loving tribute and straight-up spoof. I thought I was getting into a forgotten cult-classic, but the second half ruins it. It's not terrible, mostly it's the tonal change from spoof to "intense" chase thriller, that didn't work for me. I liked the lead actors; Nancy Allen is always cute on the run. And it was cool to see Paul Le Mat, best known as John Milner from American Graffiti, get a lead role, he has some good leading-man charisma. The sci-fi effects for a low-budget 80's film are fairly well done, the filmmakers knew what they could and couldn't do, so they use them effectively. Strange Invaders might be worth seeing if you're into dark-comedies and/or 1950's alien invasion films. - Grade: C (Seen on 6/4/08)

I watched four animated films one week early in June. Well, one technically isn't an animated film, but Speed Racer besides the actors, is probably over 50% computer graphics, it's pretty much a live action cartoon. It was actually the 2nd time I'd seen the film, making me one of the few who paid to see it twice in theaters. My son was begging to see it again, and hell, I was so impressed the first time around, that I was willing to see it again. Read my full review on this completely underrated, way-before-its-time film.

(Seen on 6/4/08) I'd been wanting to show my son the animated Transformers: The Movie, for a while, but didn't think my wife would let him watch all the violence. But after taking him to see Speed Racer twice, I figured he could handle it. He ended up loving the film, and has probably watched it at least 10 times since then. He knew about the Transformers before I ever showed him the movie. It's amazing how pop culture invades the minds of kids. He knows about Star Wars, Indiana Jones, Harry Potter, etc.; he and his friends have the funniest conversations about Darth Vader, when they haven't seen a frame of these films.

Since I was little, I've always dug the Transformers movie. They took a cheesy show, that I loved as a kid, and made a fairly sophisticated film out of it. Suddenly there were circumstances to all those laser blasts. Robots are dying all over the place, including the most famous and powerful of them all, Optimus Prime. It was incredible as a kid to see the hero of the film die within the first 30 minutes; in my opinion, they killed him off too soon, it would have been more powerful to see him die towards the end, after we had a chance to get to know him better.

The film is nicely animated, there's good detail and a lot of movement, it's way beyond the TV show, which looking back now, was one of the better animated shows of the 80's. The film has great voice work by Leonard Nimoy, Judd Nelson, Eric Idle, and most amazingly, film legend Orson Welles, as Unicron the planet eating robot. The film is only dated by the music. Its soundtrack is chock full of a cheesy 80's pop-rock songs, and that's the only thing that really bugs me about the film now. It holds up pretty damn well for an 80's movie based on a toy line; I remain impressed by the quality of this film. - Grade: B

(Seen on 6/1/08) I bought Atlantis: The Lost Empire, with a couple other recent Disney films; Brother Bear was the first film we watched. And my son had already watched Atlantis without me, but since I had never seen it, I made him watch it again, which he didn't seem to excited about. For a Walt Disney film, it's incredibly underwhelming. It has their typical animation style, which is always welcome, but the story is boring and the characters forgettable.

Milo Hatch, played by Michael J. Fox, who I really miss as an actor, has a lifetime dream of finding Atlantis. His chance comes when a well funded exploration group asks to him to lead them. Luckily his grandfather left him a book, that only he can translate, which leads them directly there. After taking a huge submarine through the depths of the ocean, than a convoy of military vehicles deep into the center of the earth, they find the lost empire Atlantis. There, Milo meets a beautiful princess, whose society is crumbling around her. The military guys, have alternative motives for wanting to find Atlantis, and they steal everything not tied down. Milo, the princess, and a motley group of explorers he's befriended along the way, take it upon themselves to stop them.

(Seen on 6/3/08) The last animated movie was something I couldn't watch with my son, the anime film Paprika. My knowledge of anime is very limited, it's pretty much Akira and Hayao Miyazaki's films. (Who my son totally adores.) I've seen 10 to 20 other random anime films, but nothing I can fully remember, half of them involving a monster with a lot of tentacles attacking Japanese school-girls, most of them pretty bad. It's a genre that I've always meant to explore more, but I haven't been compelled to beyond Miyazaki's masterpieces. I'd read some raving reviews for Paprika and when I went to put it in my queue, Netflix had a page full of 5 star reviews, so I hesitantly put it towards the top of my rather long list.

Which is really too bad, because I'm going to take another break from anime. Here's a film that was raved upon by film buffs, a subject that is very near to my heart, beautiful hand-drawn animation, something I deeply miss, and I was bored to tears. The opening five minutes (which I've posted below) really grabbed my attention, but the characters take forever to move beyond that, they keep exploring that same dream over and over. I did dig the idea of somebody using this dream device to take over the world, by attacking people's unconscious minds, but it seemed secondary, and by the time there was a huge battle between gigantic dream gods in the middle of Tokyo, I didn't care. Obviously the film works for some people, I wish it had for me, but it didn't. - Grade: C-

I'm always on the lookout for good comedies. At times it feels like I've run out of them. You can't rely on Hollywood to produce a smart, well-made comedy these days. Judd Apatow and his crew are probably the only guys operating with half a brain; otherwise you're stuck with Will Ferrell or Adam Sandler films, which I'm a fan of both, but I never feel fully satisfied after watching one of their films. Below those guys, you're not likely too find much quality. If you're lucky a decent indie-comedy comes out once a year, something like Juno or Little Miss Sunshine. But there's no consistency. This is a long winded way of saying, that I'm in a drought of American comedies from the last 30 years. I thought I'd try some French ones.

I saw The Valet a while back and remembered enjoying it. It felt very much like an old-school Hollywood comedy, so I thought I'd check out some more films from filmmaker Francis Veber. The first one that caught my attention was Le Diner de cons or The Dinner Game. It was the premise that made it sound so promising. A well off guy, Pierre, and his friends organize a dinner where they have a competition to see who can invite the biggest idiot. Something totally original sounding and a plain good idea to start a film with. What kind of morons will be there? Will the guests figure it out? Will they get revenge on their snooty hosts?

The film starts out by introducing us too some of these nincompoops, but the cake is taken, when we meet François Pignon. The guy oozes simpleton; a perfectly round, balding head, a really bad suit and constantly perplexed expression. He works in a tax agency, but his true calling in life is building models of famous items out of matchsticks. Pierre hears about the legendary dunce that is Pignon, through a friend, and invites him to dinner, thinking he has himself a winner.

The interesting thing about this film, is that these two never make it to that dinner. Pierre throws his back out, so Pignon meets him at his house, thinking that Pierre wants to see photos of his models. Instead he ends up taking care of Pierre, who along with a bad back, is having problems with his wife. Pignon's wife left him not too long before and sees a fellow in need of help. His complete ineptitude in conversing with anyone, brings Pierre even more problems. Crashing down upon him are his nutty-mistress, a scorn friend who can do nothing but laugh at his misfortune, his wife's lover, and another tax agent with a nose for fraud. In one night, his life is destroyed beyond recognition.

The dialog is so brilliantly hilarious, the story built so perfectly, the characters portrayed so beautifully, that you don't care that most of the film takes place in one room. François Pignon is one of cinema's all time great comedy creations, actor Jacques Villeret, embodies a character so hopelessly inept, but so full of compassion, that it's impossible not to love him. Poor Pierre is helpless as Pignon tears his already crumbling life into tiny pieces, but we're shown that he deserves it, and none of it's done maliciously, so it's easy to laugh at his misfortunes. The Dinner Game provided the most gut busting laughs I've had in a long time. Although, I still want to see the film about them making it too that dinner. - Grade: A (Seen on 5/31/08)

After the utter brilliance of The Dinner Game, I couldn't watch another Francis Veber film quick enough. I moved his follow-up film, The Closet, to the top of my queue. This film too has a plot ripe for a Hollywood remake. A pathetic fellow, finds out his company is about to let him go, so he and a friend come up with a scheme to help him keep his job. He's going to "accidentally" come out as a gay man, so they won't be able to fire him in fear of discrimination. This of course leads to all kinds of wackiness with his co-workers treating him differently, most notably by Félix, who isn't quite sure how to treat a gay man.

Strange... I just noticed that the lead character's name in this film is also François Pignon, as well as the lead character in The Valet and some of his other films I haven't seen. So, François, played nicely by well known French actor Daniel Auteuil, while trying to portray someone he's not, learns all kinds of lessons about life, most notably that he wasn't being true to himself in the first place. He's able to gain the respect of his co-workers, his son and his ex-wife by not being such a pushover. But most of the comedy comes in the relationship he's forming with Félix, played by everyone's favorite Frenchman Gérard Depardieu. At first Félix cracks horrible jokes about him, but is soon convinced by another co-worker, that they must become friends, and Félix begins to see François in a whole other, more romantic way.

If I'd seen The Closet, before The Dinner Game, I probably would have enjoyed it much more. The Dinner Game made me laugh by creating the unexpected, while The Closet plays it right on the nose. I knew exactly how most of the scenes were going to play out, which robbed the film of many of its laughs. It's still a decent film, that's worth seeing, well made and acted; but I gave it unfair expectations. - Grade: B (Seen on 6/8/08)

Below is the American trailer for The Closet. I hate these trailers for foreign films, where the narrator does all the talking, trying to disguise the fact that you're looking at a film with subtitles. Oh, the horror!

Did you ever wonder who the artist was that painted all those classic movie posters? You see his work and it's immediately apparent that it's the same artist. He has created some of the most recognizable imagery in the history of film: Star Wars, Indiana Jones, Back to the Future, Harry Potter, The Goonies, E.T., Shawshank Redemption, and hundreds more. His name is Drew Struzan, and his paintings have probably been seen by more eyes than any other artist in history.

He's so good, he even makes bad movies look great.

I always knew his work, but never knew anything about the man himself. Until I ran across a nice little documentary about him on the DVD for the underrated horror film The Mist. I went ahead and uploaded the film to YouTube for prosperity purpose. Here is: Drew Struzan: An Appreciation of an Artist - Featuring appearances by filmmakers Frank Darabont and Guilermo Del Toro

For more information about the man, or if you've got an extra $50 to $100K laying around, you can purchase his original artwork at: DrewStruzan.com - Or check out his biography on: Wikipedia

(Seen on 5/31/08) It's nice when a movie surprises you by being something more than it originally appeared to be. Timber Falls, although I'd read some good reviews, seemed to be nothing more than your typical slasher in the woods horror flick. And for about the first half of the film it seemed just that way, but then a twist changed it all, and it became far more interesting. Now I won't say that this film worked on all levels, but if you're a fan of horror films, especially original ones, this film would be worth giving a try.

(Seen on 5/2/08) I'm going to try an experiment here. Since I've gotten so far behind on my reviews, why not kill two birds with one stone and write my review while watching. Most likely this review will end up being about twice as long as my normal, already longish reviews. I'm going to start with Rambo. Why? Because it's brainless enough to watch and type at the same time.(And I only thought of this idea yesterday.) I'm not a huge fan of the Rambo series, though my favorite Stallone flick is probably First Blood; I've honestly never sat down and watched part 2 or 3 all the way through. I've seen so much of each, in so many sections that I feel like I've seen them, although I couldn't tell you what exactly happened in either one. When I first heard about them making Rambo 4, I thought what a lame idea. But after the fairly successful Balboa film written and directed by Stallone, and the very bloody online teaser for Rambo (see it below) I started to get excited.

So what happened so far is that, we've seen some news footage and some senseless torture of the natives of Burma to get our ire up. Now we're getting some sensitive shots of Rambo working with the land and the people. Hell, he just shot a fish with an arrow, then gave it to a cute little boy. So he's a much kinder, gentler Rambo now... but obviously that ain't gonna last.

Directed by: Sylvester Stallone - I never thought those words would give me confidence. The first laugh; "Fuck the world." That was Rambo's response to a guy trying to ask for help to get their church group up the river to bring supplies to the poor citizens of Burma. Now the good looking chick is trying to sway him, but he's still refusing, telling her to go home. Cut to: him taking them up the river, I guess she persuade him after all. Ah hell, Burmese pirates are pulling up aside them, threatening to take the woman. Damn. Rambo shot eight of them in three seconds flat. Amazingly the woman, Sarah, wants to keep going. Probably not a wise decision.

The group is now taking their medical supplies into the jungle and Rambo's heading home. Now he's burning the pirate's boat and bodies, I guess cause one of the guys threatened to report him when they got back. Boom! Village getting the crap blown out of it, and just guess what idiots are caught in the middle of it. Pretty brutal scene, kids getting shot, legs getting blown off, another kid just got thrown into a fire, blood everywhere. Soft sensitive music, and more people dying. Sarah's down, but amazingly not hurt among all the bullets and explosions. These guys better hope that Rambo doesn't catch wind.

Rambo's having war flashbacks, conveniently they have clips from the previous movies to fill us in. That didn't take long, there's a guy waking him up to tell him that the group's missing. Obviously his little crush has come into play. Manly stuff. Pounding out metal to make a machete. "Killing's as easy as breathing." Now he's taking some mercenaries up the river to save the group, they're talking a bunch of shit, but obviously Rambo could kick any of their asses, he's keeping his mouth closed for now. Somebody better not step on his toes.

"The Boatman stays with the boat." Rambo just offered to come along to fight and the mercenaries turned him down. Obviously they haven't seen First Blood. These guys ain't exactly the group from Predator, one head on a stick and they're ready to head home. Some Burmese army assholes are playing a sick game with their prisoners, betting on who'll step on an underwater mine. Splat... arrow through the head. Rambo's arrived, ready to kick ass, and show these pussies how to fight. "Live for nothing or die for something, your call."

They're sneaking around the prison-camp, freeing the hostages, getting ready for the attack. Sarah's about to get raped, Rambo doesn't like that, and out comes the machete, but instead he rips out the guy's throat with his bare hands, nice bloody choice. Slooowwww motion jump to save Sarah from gunfire, but a sniper takes out the gunmen before Rambo takes the bullet. Morning. The army has discovered the prisoners are missing, and is chasing them all into the jungle.

I'm currently 44 films behind on my reviews. I find myself skipping movies at night, simply because I don't want to get further behind. Which is not what I want to do. I want to watch as many movies as I can. So there will probably be more postings like this in the future, with mini-reviews. Today I'm going to focus on three 2007 films that could fall under the horror genre. One near classic, one mediocre film, and one terrible film; can you guess which is which yet?

(Seen on 5/27/08) Vacancy was a film I didn't have a ton of interest in seeing, the trailer made it look okay, with nothing special or unique. I still have the same feeling after seeing it, the only part that truly stood out was the opening credits. But I'll recommend it as a decent thriller, that's pretty well made, and not too stupid.

I was actually surprised by how smart they made the lead characters. Instead of constantly putting themselves in harm's way, they were making the right decision. The bad guys kept one step ahead for most of the film, simply because they were on their home turf. There were a couple of good jumps and I was pleasantly surprised they were restrained in the ending and didn't go for the obvious horror cliche'. Luke Wilson and Kate Beckinsale have a good bickering chemistry together, it convincingly felt like they'd been together a while. And I think this is the first time I've liked Luke outside a comedy, he doesn't seem to do drama well. You could do a lot worse in the thriller genre than Vacancy; it's a tight film, moving along quickly and smartly, without any truly dumb moments to drag it down. - Grade: B-

But within a few minutes it was fairly evident that this sequel wasn't going to be much better. They take way too long setting up the characters that are mostly going to end up fodder for the two species of aliens to maim and kill; with none of them are memorable. Where's our Ripley, Dutch, Hicks or "I ain't got time to bleed" Blain? I couldn't care less about a single one of these folks, they couldn't kill them off fast enough. I'll admit that the fight scenes in this film are done much better than the first Alien vs. Predator, but they're the only scenes in the film worth watching. I actually found myself getting bored about half way through the film, a real no-no for something so stupid.

Directors Greg & Collin Strause try way, way too hard to make us think about the classic film Aliens, there are a ridiculous amount of allusions to that film; from the music and sound effects ripped straight from that film, to the character archetypes and they even include military vehicles and weaponry extremely similar, even though this film takes place now and Aliens is hundreds of years into the future. The second half of the film is pretty much nothing but a bad Aliens rip-off, with a few Predators thrown in to kill an alien here or there. Another worthless addition to both series. - Grade: D

(Seen on 5/23/08) Ultra-talented writer/director Frank Darabont could go on making Stephen King adaptations for the rest of his career and I think the world would be a better place. His film Shawshank Redemption, is the absolute best King movie ever put on film; yes, I believe it's even better than The Shining. The Green Mile, was another excellent adaptation, a little long in spots, but tonally just right. With The Mist, he moves away from the prison-drama setting, into more familiar King territory, a horror story. And in my opinion he made the best horror film of 2007. One whose reputation will grow with time; because like many great films it was misunderstood upon it's first release.

The Mist takes the classic horror cliche' of trapping a bunch of people together with monsters banging on the door, and turns it on its ear. Darabont started out in horror films, writing the best of the Nightmare on Elm St., sequels with The Dream Warriors and also wrote the completely underrated remake of The Blob. So it's with no surprise that he's created a wonderfully built, incredibly well thought out B-Movie. If it weren't for a few spottily built computer monsters, The Mist would be an almost perfect horror film. There are great characters to root for in the hero David Drayton, a painter and dad, who stays calm under pressure; played nicely by the underused Thomas Jane. I particularly dug the character of Ollie; he's a chubby, balding, overage bag-boy, who has a big brain and a kick-ass action hero brewing inside him. They gave them a great human villain, in Mrs. Carmody, an over-zealous religious nut, who believes the monsters are God's apocolypse and she's ready to sacrifice the sinners to save the believers who begin to follow her. Marsha Gay Harden, brings this woman to life with such ferocity, that she is often more terrifying than any of the creepy-crawlies outside.

Although there are definitely a couple of classic monster scenes; the first time they get a taste of what's really happening, some incredibly creepy spiders, and I thought the "fishing for monsters" scene was darkly hilarious. I like how the monsters have an ecosystem all their own, with creatures of all size, from insects to dinosaurs, feeding on each other, and only turning to the humans as another source of food. The grocery store setting is the perfect place to bring characters from all walks of life together and it gives them ample food and shelter. It's only when things start to go so wrong on the inside that the heroes dare to venture out into The Mist. Once they do, it brings a whole other level to this already excellent film. The end is one of the most pessimistic I've ever seen, it leaves you with an ache in your gut, for what these characters have gone through. And I believe that's why the film didn't catch on like it should have, it's not the typical "everything is going to be okay" type of wrap up, and the film is much more powerful because of it. - Grade: A-

eRATicate was the first film I ever made. It was finished only six years ago, which seems like a lifetime ago, in how far I've come in terms of my filmmaking skills. I'd always had an interest in making films, but never had the nerve to do it, till I came up with this idea and a new friend of mine, who was a film student, pushed me to go ahead and make it. Lending me his knowledge, super-8 camera, and skill as a cinematographer. I'm glad he did, because I may never have gotten off my ass to do so, and I wouldn't be able to make a living as an editor today.

It always bugged me how dull and gray this film looked, it's not the look I intended. It was shot on B&W super-8, and then transfered about the worst way possible, by pointing a video camera at a projection of it. Something came over me recently, and I spent some time going over it, correcting the lighting and contrast, making it true B&W, darking some scenes and lightening some others. I had an urge to re-edit it as well, the film is too loose for my current tastes, but laid off, because I wanted to leave it as a reminder of where I started and the music behind it is one written piece and I didn't want to cut that up as well.

If you're interested in seeing more of my work visit:

(Seen on 5/23/08) The Simpsons show is my all time favorite TV show, they've created the smartest and funniest show for two decades. When the film came out last summer, I was pretty excited to see it. And amazingly it lived up to the hype, it was very much a long episode, but they took it beyond that as well, did some things they can't do on the show. I particularly loved the Bart skating naked scene, it had one of the biggest laughs I've had in years. I think the only thing I didn't like in the whole film, was that they called the president Schwarzenegger instead of Rainier Wolfcastle, who was always an obvious parody, but it's a minor quibble.

I got around to watching it again on DVD and it held up quite well on a second viewing. There's so much going on, that it's tough to catch all the jokes the first time. But I don't feel like spending a bunch of time writing a full review, if you're a Simpsons fan you've seen the film, and don't need me to tell you how great it is. If you're one of the rare people who doesn't like the show, what's wrong with you?... I mean, I won't be able to convince you to see it, since it's the same thing as the show only longer and better animated. - Grade: B+

(Seen on 5/22/08) Originally I was very against the idea of another Indiana Jones film. (I even thought it was a bad idea 10 years ago when the rumors first started popping up.) It was way too long since the last one; Spielberg is a different filmmaker and Harrison Ford is way too old. I saw no way of them pulling it off with the same style and panache that marked the first three films. Raiders of the Lost Ark is my all time favorite action film, it's so perfect in so many ways, those action scenes will live forever as some of the greatest ever made. Temple of Doom is a very fun follow-up, much darker in many ways, but again it has incredible action scenes and furthers Indy's legend. And I thought that The Last Crusade, while the least effective of the three, was a great send off; where we get to learn about where Indy came from and he has a great adventure with his father. I didn't see where another film could fit in. But as time went on, and the great teaser trailer came out for Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, I'll admit that the kid in me was yearning to see another Indiana Jones adventure. So it was with great excitement that I went to opening night. (The first big premiere I'd been to since the last Lord of the Rings.)

One of the things that worried me when I initially heard about the making of this film, was that I thought they'd try to ignore that Harrison Ford is nearly 20 years older. But they make it part of the film, with a couple of good jokes about Indy's age. I especially liked that they moved the action into the 50's, no longer is Indy fighting the Nazis, now he's got the Russian communists, which proves to be almost as great a set of villains. They were able to incorporate nuclear testing, the red scare, hot rods and make Indy's sidekick a motorcycle-riding greaser.

That was another thing I was skeptical about, Shia LaBeouf. I really like him, I think he's one of the most charismatic young actors around, but I thought he'd seem too anachronistic, that he wouldn't be able to play the era. But he did a great job fitting in, I think Lucas and his American Graffiti knowledge of the era, helped him find his character Mutt. It's fairly obvious who he is, and I'm glad they didn't drag out the surprise for too long.

I dug the other characters as well. It was cool to have Karen Allen back as Marion Ravenwood, always Indy's best girl. Ray Winstone was a lot of fun as Mac, the flip-flopping sidekick, who you're never quite sure which side he's on. John Hurt does the nutty- professor thing to perfection as Ox, who's spent too much time around the crystal skull, and has had his brain fried in the process. Best of all the new characters was Cate Blanchet, as Dr. Irina Spalko, equally evil and sexy, a completely memorable villain. She was so good, I'd consider the best of the series since Raiders' Colonel Dietrich. Having a great villain is paramount to these turn-your-brain off adventures, there has to be someone truly evil to root against.

There were a couple of really great action sequences; I particularly liked the truck chase through the jungle, while nowhere near as classic as the chase is in Raiders, it reminded me of it. Only one thing bothered me while watching it, the use of CGI. It was very apparent in a couple of instances and that took me out of the scene. But I won't completely denounce their use of it in the film, it's simply another tool; one that's pretty unavoidable these days; and the gruesomely-awesome scene with the giant-killer-ants,my favorite moment in the film, couldn't have been done without it.

I walked out of the theater totally satisfied with this new Indy adventure, and only one scene bugged me while watching the film. Which was Mutt swinging through the trees with a bunch of digital monkeys, too ridiculous, even for an Indiana Jones film. It wasn't till later, when I got a chance to reflect on the film, that more things started not to work for me. The entire end of the film, seems way too out there, and didn't seem the right fit for a series ground in earthly matters. Though I must admit, it fits nicely into Spielberg's filmography.